Settling In

April 28, 2009

We got woke up really early today (from our secret sleepover) to move into Airica's more permanent room.  Early at the hospital...like 4am!  We gathered all of the toys, balloons, and other items that we had been accumulating and sleepily headed down the long quiet hall.  The room was really nice.  It was a private room on the pediatric floor right next the playroom.  It was at the end of the hall so it tucked us away into a nice little private area.  There was a full bathroom, Disney channel, big windows, and they were already looking for a game system as another addition to our many amenities.

On this day, there was a special visitor at the hospital.  He jumped right up on Airica's bed to visit.  She loved this visit because she had been missing our Emma (you can see to the left of the picture her replacement Emma.  There were so many visitors and volunteers at UC Davis there for only one purpose, to make the great (sick) kids feel better, feel normal, and have some fun.

As we prepared for our stay Daddy went home to get some items to make us all feel comfortable, a new iPod for Airica (if you were reading the journal the irresponsibility with the iPod is that she lost it), and his work computer.  This is Airica's impression of what her Daddy does at work all day.  As time passed we were adapting to our current situation and trying to make the best of it as we still waited for the results.

On one hand we were anxious for the results, so we could move forward and find out it was no big thing, deal with it, and move on back into our normal happy lives.  On the other, we almost cherished the moments not knowing.  Knowing the results could possibly be so devastating that our lives would never be the same.

So, today we played some more.  Laughed, added songs to the new iPod, took real showers in our private bathroom, and prepared to be apart this night.  Alyssa had to go to school and since things were settling in Daddy and Alyssa were going to go home and rest, and try to do things like normal.

Up until now Airica seemed like a normal, healthy kid, just hanging out in a hospital.  As the evening came upon us she started feeling yucky.  She was tired, her blood pressure was low, her oxygen levels were low, she couldn't eat, and her blood tests were showing that she may need a blood transfusion due to low platelet count.  

It was time for Daddy and sissy to leave.  Daddy said his goodbyes and headed down to bring the car around.  A nurse said she would walk Alyssa down once she said her goodbyes.  My two girls hugged, they held each other so tightly, eyes pressed closed, sobbing and talking to each other in some sort of gibberish that they both seemed to understand.  The nurse helped peel Alyssa from her embrace with her sister and walked her to the car.

This night was a tough one.  First came the oxygen, then the blood transfusion.  She was so brave, BUT she did not want to see the blood!  So they drew some colorful pictures, and signs that said Princess Airica, with hearts, rainbows, and flowers to keep the bag hidden from her sight.  I held her all night as I listened and watched her breathe as I had done when she was an infant.  I watched the the bag of platelets empty.  Telling her over and over how brave she was and how much she was loved.