Adapt, Adjust, Accommodate

May 19 and 20, 2009

(My accommodations) 

Do to others what you would like to be done to yourself. Love thy neighbor as thyself. Adapt, adjust, accommodate. Bear insult, bear injury. Unity in Diversity. We are parts of the same body. Practice humility in action. Beware of power, fame, name, praise, censure.

~Swami Sivananda~

The past couple of days in the hospital were a little crazy.  Yes, I was asleep in a chair.  Airica was still so sleepy, actually too sleepy.  Because of that I actually got some good sleep, in that chair.  The doctors were starting to worry about the fact that Airica was so sleepy and not responding very well.  Especially since she has been so active while on the full life support machines.  

They made some adjustments on her machines, did some med checks and even decided to weigh her to make sure she was getting proper doses.  As you can imagine they couldn't just have her step onto a scale.  They have this crazy contraption of a swing, lift type of scale.  They placed the blanket type thing underneath her (nurses can amazingly change sheets on a whole bed underneath a patient like magic!) strapped it up and lifted her up to weigh her. It was so strong yet so gentle it was like you would imagine the stork scooping up babies into their little packages.

They had determined a few things by the end of this day.  Airica has lost a significant amount of weight over the past few weeks, all of her doses needed to be adjusted to accommodate her new weight, she seemed to be having a reaction to one of the meds, and they needed to do a more comprehensive check of her brain activity.  All of those things were taken care of and an MRI was on the agenda for the morning.

(Our adaptation of snuggle time)

That night's sleep wasn't quite as restful.  I was so worried.  Again, she had been doing so well, and this was a little stressful.  I felt really bad about the breathing tube removal and how it failed.  Did that cause the current issues?  The not knowing and the wandering mind always causes so much harm from worries and stress.  Especially when it comes to our children.

The MRI was a pretty scary thing...for me.  Airica was sleeping so soundly the whole time.  The doctors and nurses made special arrangements for me to go with her into the test.  Not inside, but I was able to sit there and hold her hand during the 45 minute test.  She had to stay still, which no longer seemed to be a problem for her, now it was the problem for us.

(Hairstyle adjustments)

The MRI room was creepy, very quiet, cold, and the test seemed to take forever.  I held Airica's hand and followed what I had learned from the nurses and explained to her step by step what was going on.  I also added a bunch of I love yous, you're so strong, and we need you to wake ups, in there as well.  After what seemed to be an eternity the test was finished.  


They wheeled Airica and her whole bed back up to her suite in the PICU and there we waited to hear about the results.  After what felt like another eternity, they finally came in to talk to us.  Her brain function was completely healthy.  They told us to be patient and give the medicine adjustments a couple of days and she should start waking up more soon.


Adapting to many things in life is a challenge that I learned at a very young age. I can deal with a lot of things.  I think of myself as a pretty strong woman.  This fight for Airica has been my biggest and hardest by far, and I am giving my all, trying my best, but I know it is not in my hands, it is not my fight.